Nana: “We should go out to breakfast tomorrow.”
Mom: “…but we’re at Cole Farms right now!”
Nana: “…but I gave up knitting! Eating out is my hobby!”
Birds are doing well in the ratings
Nana: I watch a lot of TV… and birds.
Impatient patient
Nana: One time, on Eutaw Avenue, an ambulance was speeding by the house and a drunk jumped out the back while it was moving. I don’t remember… what happened next…
Dude looks like a lady
Nana: The only time I saw my mother’s father he was in his casket. He was a pretty little man, looked like a girl.
What’s Obama’s on base percentage?
Nana: “The Red Sox won last night! They were up 6-0 at one point… Obama had a home run!”
KT: “Ortiz?”
Nana: “Oh! I shouldn’t be allowed to talk in the morning.”
Some people call them luxury seats…
[While showing photos from games at Fenway Park and the Boston Garden]
PD: “Here’s a picture of where we sat at a Celtics game. It was the very last row at the top.”
Nana: “We used to call that [racial slur] heaven.”
Polish food must be awful
Nana: “[Your late grandfather] ate all the awful things… I guess it’s a Polish meal.”
Wrong Way Palando
Nana: “I was 9 years old when Lindbergh crossed the Atlantic there… My father had a friend John Palando… He was supposed to be flying to Ireland. He got lost so they called him ‘Wrong Way Palando.'”
Editorial Commentary
Nana has started writing running commentary in the margins of the newspaper. Here’s our first example. (click for the full size image)
This Is How Gummy Worms Were Invented
Nana: “I was so young I didn’t know the difference between candy and garbage.”
This Is Why Computer Solitare Isn’t As Good
Nana: (after reviewing rules of Solitaire) “And now … you cheat.”
So… That Would Be At Least Two?
Nana: “You have more bras than I have brains.”
That’s Bull..imia
Nana: “No one looks like you who isn’t bulimic.”
Childhood of a New Hampshire Landmark
Nana: “The Old Man in the Mountain? I knew him when he was the little boy in the valley.”
Made with Paint
Nana: “Kristian! Johnny said this was your gum!”
KT: “No, that’s not mine, but I’ll take it…”
Nana: “No you won’t! It’s Chinese, it probably has lead in it!”
Home Abroad
Nana: “If you leave you’ll never come back. Just study abroad right here.”
A Whole New Meaning for Hello Kitty
Nana: “You have cat hair on your back. I didn’t want to say anything because I thought it was the style.”
Am I Blue?
Nana: ”If God wanted you to have blue nails you would’ve been born with them!”
Heavenly Footwear
Nana: “I hope they have shoes up in heaven, otherwise Jim won’t know what to do with himself…”
Wear and Tear
KT: “[blah blah blah, BPA, Maine constitution, blah blah, law blah blah]!!”
Nana: “Don’t wear your brain out!”