Archive for December, 2011

Give a hoot, comrade. Don’t pollute.

In the late 1980s, someone called to conduct a survey for a school project and asks what should be done about the pollution problem.
Nana: “Blow it all to Russia!” *hangs up*

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Outlasting their usefulness

After being treated for breast cancer and a hysterectomy, she told her doctor…
Nana: “When these things are through being useful, they ought to dry up and fall off!”

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Surprise!

In a discussion about cremation, Nana couldn’t decide if she wanted to be cremated or not. After thinking about for a while…
Nana: “Oh, surprise me!”

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He may need to see The Doctor…

Nana: “Did you see Pat’s T-shirt with the guy running out of the outhouse?”
NT: “That’s not an outhouse! It’s a phone box.”
Nana: “It doesn’t look like he just finished a phone call. It looks like he saw somebody in there.”

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Christmas bunnies

Nana: “The rabbits were all piled up they looked like a Christmas tree! They didn’t know who they were trying to get pregnant. I’ve never seen such action before in my life!”

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Sheet happens

Nana: “Take Kristian’s sheet over to the house.”
NT: “His what?”
Nana: “His sheet.”
NT: “His what?”
Nana: “His sheet! S-H-I-T sheet!”

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